- Condition your mind to see every man as a brother.
Why? Infidelity is toxic to marriage. You need to prepare your mind early that every guy is your brother. This will help keep your relationship with males in check before and after you are married. Even if you are engaged, you have to remember that this guy is your brother in Christ first, I know this is hard to do if you’re attracted to the person but you have to train your mind until after the wedding.
- Be complete in Christ.
Why? Marriage and your husband can’t complete you. In fact, no one can complete us but God. If you are not happy now, trust me from what I have heard from couples, marriage wouldn’t make you any happier. To believe that someone will complete you is an absolute myth. Only God can fulfill us.
- Pray for God’s choice of a mate..
Why? God knows us more than anyone, he is the best matchmaker cos he knows the person that will fix you best. Don’t pick someone and ask God for his blessing. Ask God, this person is interested in me is this the person you want me to marry. This is why it is very important we have a relationship with God where we can hear his voice clearly.
- Learn to Cook…
In American culture, it’s not a big deal if you don’t cook but in Nigerian culture, a woman who can’t cook is a disgrace to her family.
- Start now to pray for your marriage
- Abstain from sex till marriage- if you can have sex outside of marriage, you will have sex outside of your marriage. Studies show premarital sex increases risk for divorce–Read here– (http://www.focusonthefamily.com/about_us/focus-findings/marriage/premarital-sex-and-divorce.aspx)
- Learn to manage your money.. Please don’t bring children into this world with no plan how you will take care of them. It is your responsibility to take care of your kids not the government.
- Set your mind and keep it set that when you marry that divorce is not an option. If you are engaged, tell your fiancé how does he feel about this concept? In cases of abuse where your life and your children’s life are threatened that is serious emergency situation and you need to take the necessary steps to get out of that situation.
- Be honest about everything with the person you are about to marry. I mean it’s better they know all about your skeletons before you marry them. Especially for women, if any of your body part is fake please your fiancé deserves the right to know before he marries you. People put people in weird situations when they are not honest before marriage. Morale of the story: it will hurt you more later if you aren’t honest.
- If you want kids, babysit other ppl’s kids to get a feel what it would be like to have your own kids. Do you even like kids?.. You need to know these things. If you don’t want kids pls don’t marry someone who wants kids cos you will definitely have conflict.
- Know your character traits and develop the character traits that will help you in marriage. For example: if you are quick tempered, you need to work on that because if you don’t that might be a problem in your marriage.
- Gain from wisdom from couples that have been married more than 30 years and still married
- Don’t compare your life to others. You will never be content in your life. This is a very important concept: so when you do get married, you wouldn’t compare your husband and kids with another person.
- Use your words to build the people you love even when they hurt you.
- Marry someone you sincerely love. Marrying someone who worships the ground you walk on will make you feel trapped in marriage if you don’t love that person equally.
- Love yourself. You can’t love anyone until you love yourself.
- Learn to forgive easily and quickly.
- Enjoy yourself as a single so that after you get married you don’t feel like you are missing out on life. Your priority should change after you are married.
- Learn to say “I am sorry”
20. Most important, ask God to prepare you to be that Proverbs 31 woman for your future husband and family!