Father’s day is coming up!! My amazing father will be here for father’s day.
The best gift a woman can give her children is to pick a good man for her future children. I think it is not wise to be having unprotected sex with any man you wouldn’t be proud to give your children as a father.
Please avoid these types of guys when you want children:
1. A guy who is currently not taking care of his children from previous relationships
2. A guy who has no financial capital to provide for your child
3. A guy has a crazy baby’s mama he cannot control.
4. A male who is obviously sleeping around with every female he comes in contact with.
5. A guy who doesn’t want kids.
6. A guy who is not prepared to have a baby.
7. A guy who has a reckless lifestyle with no clear plans of where he is going with his life.
8. A guy who is not responsible for himself. He has no control over his finances. His mother or father pays for this upkeep.
9. He doesn’t have any long-term goals that include you. If you want to get married before kids. He has no goals of marrying you.
10. The guy who you know obviously doesn’t like you. If you like him and think you can convert him to like you after a child, think again!! If you like him and he doesn’t like you, you are only hurting yourself having a baby with him.
Think about the type of father you want to give your children. Give your children a man they can be proud of. Give them a father who will do them right all the days of their life. Give them a man who will fight for them.
The best gift you can give your future children is to pick a good man to be their father!!
To all great fathers out there.. God bless You for all you do!
Hey Semi. Remember me? I am that grad student you dumped because I couldn’t afford the Brazilian hair you wanted. I told you, “Babe, please be patient with me until I am done with graduate school.” You told me you couldn’t wait. You dumped our five year relationship for a guy who borrowed money to marry you. You broke my heart then I realized it was a blessing in disguise. Now, I have a woman who loves me for me, not my money. We are co-partners in our multimillion dollar business we started two years ago. When you left, I discovered women like my wife still exist. My wife and I are expecting our first child. We will be celebrating in Dubai; you are invited with your family. I hope you are happy in the hut with your husband.
I pray this will never be your portion in Jesus name! A lot of women like Semi are short-sighted to see beyond the present. I have heard stories like this time and time again where a lady mistakes a hero for zero and a zero for a hero. It is hard pill to swallow when you realize you have made a lifelong mistake you can’t eradicate. Thus, it is very important to recognize when the guy in your life is hero.
The concept of a hero or a zero is subjective. My hero may be your zero and vice versa. It is important for you to recognize who is a hero. Personally, the differences between a hero and a zero has more to do with character. But that’s just my opinion. No matter where that guy is today, see that guy five years from now. If he is still a zero then you need to let him go. No condition is permanent. If you miss out on a great guy, you have only yourself to blame. A man who is focused, disciplined, and working towards his goals is a hero regardless of what his bank account says. A man who has children he is not taking care of is a zero. A man who blames everybody but himself for his current state in life is a zero. A man who flashes with expensive cars with no savings towards his future is a zero. But a man who lives within his means and makes wise decisions with his money is a hero.
To be honest, if you miss out on a great guy, check yourself because you might be a zero.
The room was dead silent as we were exchanging our vows and then she looked straight into my soul and said, “I will say ‘I do’ on one condition—you answer this question correctly.” My head started spinning. What was she doing? My whole family flew from Nigeria to come to this wedding. Even my professors, co-workers, classmates, and childhood friends were all here. My uncle, who hates to travel, was also present with his wife. In a blink of an eye, I saw myself acting in a Nigerian movie, but it felt real. Why am I an actor in this scary movie? This Nigerian movie was really happening in my life.
She asked, “what is my favorite color?” The million dollar question… I asked her whispering, “Baby, why are you asking me now? This is our wedding day..” Of course, I didn’t know the answer so I started panicking on the inside. I looked at the bridesmaid’s dresses for a clue. The bridesmaids wore blue, so I answered, “Baby, it’s blue. Can we go on?” She stood for about a minute looking at me with tears rolling down her face and she turned to the maid of honor and gave her the flowers. She picked up her dress and ran. As she was running, I heard a lady say, “Gurl, he African… You better run, girl!!”
If this was a real Nigerian movie, the producers would add a dramatic Nigerian music here to compliment the shocking turn of events. I had no idea my fiancé was a track star. She ran so fast out of that church. My eyes in tears, I became Usain Bolt and ran after her. The church was in an uproar. Guests looked at each other confused.
I finally met up with my bride. I asked her what was going on. She said, “Baby.. you don’t know my favorite color.” I told her, “Baby, why did you wait till our wedding day to ask me?” She said, “Because I knew you would walk away if I said ‘no’ to your proposal.” Baby, I know you are under a lot of pressure to get married. Two months is not enough time to fully know a person. I really like you but I need time to get to know you fully and you know me as well.” My heart was burning in anger, disappointment, and anxiety. How did she expect me to march into a room filled with well-wishers only to tell them that there will be no wedding today? I spent a lot of money to help make this day happen. I look my baby in the eyes and it all made sense.
Suli and I met in school. It was love at first sight, I liked her from the minute she said hello. It took her a while to catch the cupid arrow from me, though. I didn’t mind, I waited patiently as a “friend.” When we started dating, we were inseparable, we were like those romantic couples in American movies. We did everything together. Suli didn’t mind the idea of marriage. I spoke to her about marriage from day one that I neglected what she really wanted. I was so overwhelmed with my desires that I ignored her desires.
We hugged each other and I told the MC to tell the audience that there will be no wedding today and they are free to eat and dance all night as their heart desires. Suli and I left hand-in-hand out of the wedding venue still in our wedding attires, we received several congratulations from strangers on our way to the car. We drove away still hand-in-hand.
Two years later on a private stage with a few friends, a minister with some family members and she asked me, “What is my favorite color?” I answered, “You don’t have a favorite color, you silly girl.” She said, “I do,” and kissed me.
TO GOD BE THE GLORY!!
Morale of the Story: Nigerian guys stop proposing after the first date. What does she want? The world doesn’t evolve around you. Invest the time to know the person you are marrying.
Heard a story of a brother and sister who attended the same church, got attracted to each other, started courting and eventually got married in the same church. Few weeks after their wedding, they had a misunderstanding and in the course of argument, the husband told the wife that if you say anymore word I will slap you and that she shouldn’t think he’s that kind of spiritual brother she met in church and that he only wanted to have a good wife in church and the wife also replied that if he dare slap her she will break bottle on his head and that she’s not the kind of spiritual sister he met in church and that she also wanted to get the right man in church. So that’s how two wrong partners in form of pretence got married.
The above story is just the truth about relationship, we were taught in physics that like charges repel while opposite charges attract but one of the things I’ve learnt in relationship is that like people attract and opposite people repel. You will attract the kind of person you are. A right person will attract the right partner while a wrong person will attract the wrong partner. So instead of hoping to find the right man/lady
for you, you can take time to ‘become the right person’ because the right partners are also looking for right persons that will complement them.
So let’s look at how to become the right person.
SELF-DISCOVERY: The fundamental thing required in becoming the right person is self-discovery. The problem we have among many young people is that they don’t know who they are and that is why they tends to dress anyhow, talk anyhow and do all manner of things just because they lack that sense of identity. The question is; who are you?Discovering yourself is not what you can do on your own, you don’t know yourself and once you don’t know the purpose of a thing abuse is inevitable. So self-discovery means knowing who you are and why you are created (your purpose). Until you know yourself, you can’t be the best that God wants you to be. It is in your discovery that you will get to know why you are created. It is your discovery that gives you an identity; it distinguishes you from everyone else and helps you to live life maximally. Discover your purpose today.
Like I said earlier that discovering yourself is not what you can do on your own, you don’t know yourself and it takes someone that knows you to reveal who you are to you. The only person who knows you is God (Jeremiah 1:5) and you need to have a relationship with God before He can reveal yourself to you, you need to be born again by accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and saviour. Jesus Christ is the one who connect us to God; He is the way to the Father (John 14:6).
For you to discover yourself, you must cultivate a daily relationship with God. You can only discover your purpose out of an intimacy with God. The more of God you know or the more you know God, the more you know yourself. Before you think of choosing the right partner you must first become the right person. God wants you to know Him before you know the right partner.
Adam had a personal relationship with God before God brought him a wife, let God form you and put you in the right place. You are to carry your relationship with God into your relationship with the opposite sex. Your relationship with God should be guideline for your relationship with the opposite sex. Spend time to study the word of God and let it become a part of you; discover the truth about you from the word of God. When you inquire of God, He answers you (Jeremiah 33:3)
Marriage is a continuation of God’s plan for your life; it is not something you can just rush into because the bulk of your life will be spent in marriage. So take time to discover yourself in God, discover your purpose and ensure you cultivate a daily relationship with God.
DESIRE AND DECIDE IT: It is not enough to wish to be the right person; you must desire it and decide you will be the right person no matter what. God honours our desires especially when we tell it to him in prayers (mark 11:24), so you must desire to be the right person and also pray that God make you the right person. Also, you are where you are today because of the decisions you have taking over time. The firm decision you take will help you to pay the sacrifices needed to become the right person. Daniel decided not to defile himself (Daniel 1:8), so you too can decide today to become the right person.
ADD VALUE TO YOUR SELF: One of the things that give us an edge in life is knowledge. Knowledge is life and power. You are who you are today because of what you know and what you don’t know. You are also responsible for what you know or don’t know.
So in order for you to become the right person, you must keep adding value to yourself (2 Peter 1:5-8), study books and materials that will make you become a better person. You also need wisdom, ask God for wisdom (James 1:5). Wisdom will make all the difference in your life. So get wisdom (Proverb 4:5-7).
Discover your talent, skill-up in the area of your talent, then decide and begin to deliver solutions to human problems using your talent. Improve on yourself, dress decent and moderately; you will be addressed by the way you dress(your appearance matters a lot). Read books on leadership, relationship, business, attend seminars and apply what you’ve learnt to your life.
POSITIVE ASSOCIATION: The people you associate with matters a lot in determining who you will become. Like the popular saying that says show me your friends and I will tell you who you are, you must be mindful of the people you associate with. Associate with godly people and make friends with people you know you want to be like. If you must become the right person, you must make conscious effort to select who you associate with. He that walks with the wise shall be wise (prov 13:20).
MIND YOUR MIND
You need to mind what you allow into your mind. It also goes a long way in determining who you will turn out to be. Carefully scrutinize the materials you feed on. You are a product of what you allow into your life. So you must constantly guard your heart (prov 4:23). The songs you listen to, the movies you watch and the magazine you read all contribute to who you become in life. You need to constantly renew your mind with the word of God and disabuse your mind from various lies and deceit of the devil. Let the word of God transform you into the right person you want to become (Rom 12:2).