Tag Archives: Hurt

Divorce is NOT an option!!

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I am at the stage in my life where I am accepting applications for 9jaboy4real, if you are interested email me at [email protected] (only serious applications will be accepted, LOL!!). In a few years, I will be married and have children (by God’s grace). Even though, I am not yet married I am always thinking about what’s best for my children. What’s best for my children guides a lot of my decisions because if I like it or not; the decisions I make now will affect my children positively or negatively. I don’t want my children to suffer for the poor decisions I make in life.

I went to college with a guy who said that his dad lived down the street from his house but he refused to walk a few blocks to come see him. I saw the pain in that boy’s eyes from that day, I decided I’d never make a careless decision that will jeopardize my children’s happiness. I grew up with both my parents so I don’t fully understand what it means to only have one parent and rejection by another parent. I have heard of enough stories of children who felt abandoned by their father and I can’t imagine the emotional pain they go through every day. In life you can’t control what happens to you most of the time but what I can control I will.

Statistics are against children from broken homes. I have seen how broken families mess up children and I don’t want to put my children through that. Divorce affects the children more than it affects the parents. For the sake of my children, divorce can’t be an option.

Don’t get me wrong in the presence of verbal or physical abuse; divorce has to be an option because I need to stay alive to take care of my children. African women will do anything for their children and I am no different.
I don’t want to bring my children into an emotional mess. Each child deals with divorce in their own way. It is not God’s will for my children to be born into a broken home. My children deserve the right to have parents walking side by side to give them a better future.

To 9jaboy4real (whoever you are): Divorce is NOT an option!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

African Parents eh..

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Recently my dad asked me if I have someone to marry?
I couldn’t believe my ears..
In my head, I couldn’t believe my dad asked me that question.
Before I left for school, I was given the advice focus on your books and no boys.
Having a boyfriend in my family as a girl is a taboo.

African Parents surprise me sometimes..
How am I supposed to have someone to marry when you clearly said I shouldn’t have any boys in my life while in school?
Was I wrong for taking your advice?
Did I commit any crime by obeying you as my parents?
I went to school focused on my books and I ignored a lot of guys out of respect for you and now, miraculously I need to be married because I am done with school.
Sometimes our African Parents are not fair..
They tell you to do something and when you do as you are told; they want to turn around to stab you in the back like you shouldn’t have taken their advice in the first place.

I am prepared to suffer any consequence of being obedient.
I refuse to become that lady who now wears miniskirts, dresses and heavy makeup in efforts to find her husband to appease her family.
Since when did my relationship with a man become more important than my relationship with God?
The whole time I was in school, you spoke to me about “God, God, God” after I graduated is about “husband, husband, husband.”

First of all it is not a girl’s place to find her husband.
If love doesn’t happen naturally then I guess, I will be single for a while.
Nobody is pressuring me to do anything.
I will not force myself on any guy to stop my family from bugging me about this husband thing.
I hate when African Parents pressure their daughters about marriage.
It is not a girl’s place to find her husband.
No African guy wants a desperate girl in the first place.

Stop pressuring your daughters because they are of age or done with school to get married.
Let love happen naturally.
If love doesn’t happen naturally for me, I will be single, content and full of life.
Guys chase girls to marry not the other way around.
Nobody should be pressuring any girl to find her husband.
Her husband should find her.
Till I meet my husband, I will be content in CHRIST.
Sorry dad, I am not going to force myself on any guy or marriage to appease you.

Moving On Prayer

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Dear Lord,

How can more than 2 year of investment vanish in span of just two days. I’d be lying if I say, I didn’t like him. What do u call love in the presence of fear? Or can love strive in the absence of trust? We fought, giggled, laughed with each other and even stayed up to insane early hrs of the morning conversing. Now, we have nothing to show for it. Why did it have to end this way? The mountain was too big for us to climb.

Help me to trust you knowing that this road bump was the best thing that could have ever happened to us. You’re the source of everything good. Help me to trust you that the best is yet to come for me. Being complete is you is the goal from here out. You’re the source of my strength, joy, peace and happiness. moving-on  James 1:17 says “every good and perfect gift comes from the Lord.” May I center my life on the  best gift you gave to me by sacrificing your son. Your son died, so I could be free from the law of  sin and death. Life is nothing without you. You’re the essence of life.

I serve you with all my heart. I give it all to you by serving nothing else. May I not idolize anything but only you. He wasn’t your best for me because if he was it would have worked out. This companionship wasn’t bless by you. in the beginning. The bible said the foolish man built his house on the sand and he suffered the consequences. Anything that starts with the wrong foundation will crash in the midst of storms, and dangerous winds. Your word is the strongest foundation to build anything to last. With you as the foundation, a relationship is sure to stand in the midst of perilous threats. You’re the pillar that holds this life of mine. Without you, I am nothing.

As I close this chapter, I forgive every hurt and pain that I procured over the yrs. Every seed of hurt, distrust, manipulation and satanic fuse of forgiveness is hereby, uprooted. My heart is free of hate, disgust, self-pity and depression. My heart soars over the problems of the past and makes the best out of every good and bad memory. My heart will not deter from your word. I will use my grief as a stepping ground to something better for this next chapter.

The next chapter will be full of bliss and happy ending. I will accept my past with open arms and use it as a bridge to better things. I will not retaliate in anger or hurt to the person. My heart within is full of joy, peace and everything necessary to help me move on.

Life is full of challenges. It is time to challenge my challenges, and make them to work for my benefit. I trust my instincts and I will never turn away from trusting them to any untruthful person.  , I chase the one who really proved he cared about me with no question YOU! I am complete in You.

Amen!!!

How Great is our God Day 9

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God's love“U hurt me I still love you, you don’t want me I am still interested in you, u hit me I smile at you.
I will still do more because that is what true love is all about.”-James Ogbor

I like this quote cos it captures what we do to God everyday but he still loves us.
God loves us so much.

I can’t fully comprehend God’s love,
so I can’t fully explain the magnitude of his Love.

Bible says, “Even when we were yet sinners, Christ still died for us”-Romans 5:8
No Greater Love.

God is the creator of Love.
God is Love-1 John 4:8

We hurt him everyday, yet he still loves us.
How Great is Our God!!!