Dear Mr. Someone,

Boy.. Nothing can stop my love for you.

I have conditioned my heart to only love you. I conditioned my thoughts to only think about you. I pray, I grow into the woman who will never disappoint you. I pray, I do you good all the days of my life. My heart beats for only God and you. You are the father of my future children. I can’t wait to meet you. I pray you love God more than me. I pray, we love God more than each other. I will close my eyes until God opens my eyes to you. I am ready for good and bad days with you. God first… Till we meet, I will wait for you!!!

Things you do as a teenager that you will regret when you get older:

  1. Smoking-it might look “cool” to smoke among your peers, but it is setting you up for a lifetime of smoking addiction. Everything you do as a teenager is not always “kool.” One day you will grow up to regret it. Google the consequences of smoking and see what you are exposing yourself to. Smoking increases your chances of various health problems. If you don’t want to listen to me just make sure you have a good health insurance.

    2. Smoking illegal circumstances: again might seem “kool” now that you are young but you can’t find a legit job when you get older. You can be a genius and become a business owner, but when you are hooked on this stuff you will be doing business to support your drug addiction. Smoking illegal substances opens the door to extreme poverty and bad judgment. Your teenage friends don’t know how smoking these illegal substances will affect you for the rest of our life. Don’t believe me: Get ready to fail some drug tests. If you can’t pass your drug test, you wouldn’t be able to get a legit job. Hello, poverty!!

    3. Bullying the nerdy kids-guess what? Nerds are smart. What do we know about smart people? Smart, nerdy people make money. When the nerd you bullied in high school ends up being your boss (you will regret ever bully nerdy kids).   Bully shouldn’t take place in our schools; however, it is happening. We should all take a stand against bullying. You don’t know people’s future. The nerd you bullied could be the next president. If you like it or not, you will always regret bullying that nerd because the nerd will always win!

    4. Joining a gang: only gets you up for time in prison. Are you in a gang? Enjoy your life now as a free kid because you will soon sleep in a room right next to your toilet. Don’t allow your peers to fool you; being in a gang makes you weak. Nothing positive comes from being in a gang. Smell the roses now because you will soon be sitting in a juvenile prison regretting your actions. Nobody is greater than the law.

    5.Dropping out of High school– Yes, you can always go back and get your GED. People still regret the actions that lead them to drop out.

6. Having a baby: you are not financially, psychologically ready for the stress that comes with having a baby. You are a baby having a baby. The responsibility that comes with having a baby is one that you are absolutely not ready for. Your whole life changes when you have a baby. Your baby becomes the center of your world. A lot of teenagers regret having a baby this young.

7. Getting married-As a teenager, you are still growing and learning about the world and love. You will soon find out that the person you are in high school is not the person will you become after college. You are still growing. Give yourself time to grow. Your body is going through changes. Your hormones are raging. Getting married now is only something you will regret later.

Not Another Love Song..

Personally, I think we have enough songs about love, premarital sex and drugs. These types of songs are popular because they sell. Instead we need songs about girls suffering from eating disorders because they don’t look like the girls in the  music videos. We need songs about teenagers who are on drugs, and how they are ending their life before starting it. We need songs about guys in gangs, who think for some reason they are invisible from the law. We need to sing about little pregnant teen girls with no plan for a better future for neither themselves nor their baby.

We need to stop contradicting ourselves. Why condemn the stripper dancing in a club for money and you don’t condemn naked ladies in most of these videos? It amazes me how a lot of kids really look up to these stars. They don’t sing about the importance of getting a good college education and bettering themselves. They sing and rap about all the parts in a female’s body, premarital sex, drugs and shooting someone. These songs paint this fictional world that doesn’t exist. It’s impossible to have that many women without a sexually transmitted disease. Women are not objects that men can toy with and move on. These videos only promote a one-sided type of beauty to women. These videos capitalize on the fact that most women only want guys who have money (Not true).
People have heard enough songs about gangbangers, womanizers, drug addicts and premarital sex experts. We need songs to direct our youth in the right direction.

Single and Not Waiting

Written By:  Rachel Selinger

I’m 23, I just graduated from university, and I’m single.

Many of my friends are married, and a few are starting to have children. And I feel as if I just graduated from high school again. You could say my life is in transition. And it’s true; I am in the middle of shifting myself from university to the career world. But I’ve started to wonder about whether it’s right to refer to my singleness as an in-between stage.

What exactly am I in-between again?

It’s the first day of the rest of my life.” I recently I heard someone on TV say this about her wedding day, and it really bothered me. While I don’t want to discount the gift of marriage, I must say I’m a bit confused and frustrated with this sentiment. I’ve heard the cliché before, but I suddenly felt the weight of it. As if it equates marriage as the start of life, or at least the good part.

Don’t misunderstand my frustration; I think there is a beautiful element of starting a new family with your spouse. I’m all for godly marriage. But what I’m afraid of is viewing life through the lens of marriage as the goal. For waiting to get married before life starts.

I’m afraid, because I’m afraid it has happened to me. I’ve been living like I’m waiting for someone to get here. And it isn’t Jesus.

I’ve wasted my time, my energy, and my emotions on this concept that singleness is just a waiting room for a relationship. I’m tired of this view that my life begins when I wake up next to my husband, because I’m pretty sure my life began 23 years ago when my mom gave birth. And this mentality has robbed my joy.

As much as I’d like to place all the blame on Christian culture, the perpetual “Have you met anyone yet?” question the world asks me, and the reality that my Facebook feed looks more like a Pinterest wedding board these days, I am convicted of my own failures.

I’ve been living like God owes me something. Like he hasn’t held up his end of the deal. He has given me the desire for relationship and marriage, and he just hasn’t followed through.

I’ve been living under the impression that I deserve a relationship.

I’d be lying if I said Christian culture does much to inhibit this mentality. There seems to be a deep understanding and appreciation for the gift of marriage, but not so much for the gift of singleness (if it’s treated like a gift at all). Rather, singleness is something to be cured. Like I’ve got a disease, and introducing me to your single friend might perhaps cure us both. Singleness is the lump of coal, the gift that is never on your Christmas list.

There are at least a handful or us standing around, wondering what happened. (After all, I have been pretty nice this year.)

But it’s never been about being entitled, or even about being nice. I have to stop thinking that I’m doing something wrong here.

Well actually I am, but it isn’t about fixing something that will magically make a boyfriend appear. It is about changing the direction of my heart.

 “I’d rather have the right God than the wrong man.” –- Christen Rapske

People talk all the time about pursuing people or things for the wrong reasons, but maybe we pursue God for the wrong reasons. Maybe subconsciously I’ve been treating God like he’s a vending machine. And my pursuit of him has really been a pursuit of someone else.

When did Christ cease to be enough?

And when did I stop finding my identity, self-worth, and fulfillment in Him, only to place my life on hold for someone I’ve never even met?

Each day is a gift, and I’m not waiting for it to get here. It is present in every moment, and it begins anew daily.  Man-less or not, I want to wake up every morning and be excited because I get to spend my day with the God who created the universe.

And I want to do that for the rest of my life.

Click here to see the article. 

A list of men God will NEVER give YOU..

I am still on a break from blogging lol.. Seriously, I am.. hahah..

Single Ladies,

I have been watching this “Where is he Already?” series on Youtube. Have you seen it?
You should definitely check it out. Here is the first episode.

God will never give you:

1. A married man-if you are dating one, please…move on, he is off the market. (Mark 10:9-what God has joined together, let no man put asunder).. I feel the need to say this again. GOD will NEVER GIVE YOU a MARRIED MAN. Again? GOD WILL NEVER GIVE YOU A MARRIED MAN. 

2. A non-believer-2 Cor 6:14-Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship does righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion does light have with darkness?

3. A man who verbally or physically abuses you

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.-1 Cor 13:4-7

4. An irresponsible man-
if he can’t take care of himself..he can’t  take care of you.

Is he living with his mom?
Is he in debt?
Does he pay his own bills?
Does he know how to manage money?
What are his plans for the future?
Is he taking care of his kids if he has any?
How many baby mamas does he have?

You will know a responsible man when you see one.. I trust you.
“For this reason a man will leave his mother and father and cling to his wife”-Matthew 19:5

James 1:17-Every good and perfect gift comes from the lord and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.

Love and MEN..

I was reading Genesis 25 and I realized something.
Ladies, if a man loves you, he will love your kids as well.

Genesis 25:1-5
1. Abraham again took a wife, and her name was Keturah.
2. And she bore him Zimran, Jokshan, Medan, Midian, Ishbak, and Shuah.
3. Jokshan begot Sheba and Dedan. And the sons of Dedan were Asshurim, Letushim, and Leummim.
4. And the sons of Midian were Ephah, Epher, Hanoch, Abidah, and Eldaah. All these were the children of Keturah.
5. And Abraham gave all that he had to Isaac.
6. But Abraham gave gifts to the sons of the concubines which Abraham had; and while he was still living he sent them eastward, away from Isaac his son, to the country of the east.

Abraham had children from other women but as you can see..
He loved Issac more than all his other children.
As you read the old testament, you will see this trend.

The same is true for men today,
a man who loves a woman will marry her and care more for the children she bares him.

I heard about this lady who thought she was the only child, but as she grew older..
she discovered she had a lot of step brothers and sisters.
Unfortunately, she was the only child her father fathered. This should tell us something women..

Sleeping with a man and having his baby doesn’t mean NOTHING.
If he didn’t love you before the baby,
he wouldn’t love you after the baby..
it’s really a gamble if he will love your child.
There are rare cases that a man will step up and take care of his responsibilities even if he doesn’t love the woman.

As we can see,
LOVE is very important.
Abraham gave all he had to the child he loved and on top of that sent all the other kids eastward away from his precious Issac.

Ladies, we have to do our kids a favor and marry men who love us.
Again, if he didn’t love you before you had kids, he wouldn’t love you after kids..
Plus, it’s a coin toss if he will love your kids.

Why are American Kids so mean?

This was the question I asked my 12yrs old self when I started attending middle school in the United States.
I was different..(very different. In fact, different is an understatement).
I was flesh out of boarding school in Nigeria that means my hair was short (very short, In fact I could pass for a guy).  The Boarding school I attended in Nigeria, every student is  required to cut off their hair because they didn’t want us to occupy our time with hair.

My hair was very short, I had this thick African accent (some of my peers thought I was Jamaican). Some thought my accent was kool but some didn’t really know how to accept me maybe cos I was completely different from them.

Ironically, the black kids were the worse.. Most of my bullies were black kids.                        ?????
Why are people who look like me mean to me?
I expected the white kids to be the bullies cos I was completely different from them.
No..
My very own ppl bullied me.

The only difference between me and the black kids in my school was my thick accent, short hair and weird clothes. I was similar to them but why didn’t they accept me?
Coming to an unknown country, I was already culturally shocked.
But having people who looked like me bully and reject me was a hard thing for my 12 yrs old self to handle.

The white kids accepted me but don’t catch me between two white kids together that means I’d be ignored as if I wasn’t even there.
I wasn’t only bullied by one race, I was bullied by two races.
The white kids only accepted me when none of their other white friends were around
or when they fully accepted me, they told me, I couldn’t be invited to their sleep over parties because their parents were racist.

Mind you, I grew up in a country where everybody is literally BLACK.
Race was never a problem for me.
I never saw my race as a problem until I came to the States.
Certainly, I thought something was wrong with me..
why didn’t I just fit in?
In middle sch and high school.. I can’t really remember having a true black friend.

When I started wearing my hair in braids to school. The black girls were like “she thinks she is all that.” I have now figured out, they thought I was all that (jealous). Middle school was just a preparation for a full year of bullying in 9th grade. I don’t know what I did to these two black guys in my English class, they always had something to say. I couldn’t quite place why I was still a target after my hair grew, I didn’t wear weird clothes anymore. I guess, it didn’t matter that I  looked like them.. cos I was still different.

To the white kids: I was black.
To the black kids: I was obviously different

I do admit I was different; however, after my weird clothes changed, my hair grew and my accent was not as thick. Why was I still different to black kids?

I should blame these kids for being so inconsiderate of my situation as this poor little African girl who just wanted to be accepted. No. The kids are not at fault. I am now grown ( I think, I am lol!). I think Parents contribute a lot to how kids think about their peers.

bulliesParents if you constantly tell your kids to only talk to a certain race, class. etc.. you are opening your kids to an environment where they think something is wrong with people who don’t look like them or you don’t want them to associate. Why do you think bullying is still a problem in American schools? I am aware some bullies have issues at home but what about bullies whose parents tell them to only be friends with kids that look like them?

Kids are so innocent and pure. God didn’t create kids to see race. Allow a child and they will play with everybody. Sadly, parents start as early as elementary school to poison their kids minds to segregate. Racism/discrimination/bulling  is still alive cos you are allowing it. How can you honestly teach your kids to hate or not associate with that race or class? I understand educating your child not to associate with kids who are trouble makers.

When you fill your kid’s head with hate at home don’t act surprised when he or she acts on it in school. The best place to teach tolerance is at home.

Black parents, your child doesn’t only have to deal with bullies from another race but also from your own race. I call it, double threat of Racism from kids of their own race. Bullying doesn’t discriminate but I do think black kids are easy targets.

Bullying is rampant in this society cos parents and society are telling little kids to stay away from people different from them for no particular reason.

Yes, there’s no right answer to this problem.
You want to stop bullying?!
Start by educating your children and lead by example.
Little kids are dying cos of bullying,
you need to start talking.
I know most of you wouldn’t do anything until your own child becomes a victim.