Tag Archives: Decisions

I like my Man..

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-Masculine (huge muscles and all), Dark-skinned and everything masculine (nothing feminine)..
My man is the kind of man you look at and all you see is a “MAN!!”
I like my Man EXTRA, EXTRA MANLY with no trace of femininity.
Ladies, its very easy to focus on the physical characteristics of what we want in man that we forget the most important thing.
Looks are important too don’t get it twisted but character is more important.
Trust me, I want a man who looks good but most importantly I want a man who..

1. Loves God
2. Loves people
3. Great father

….etc.. etc..

His muscles will go through natural old age atrophy. His good looks will disappear one day. There’s more to love than just looks. Let’s forget about looks for a second. What kind of man do you want?

Please write it down..

Start by writing “I want a man who”

Example:
1. Provides for his family
2. Hardworking
3. Honest
4. Intelligent
5. Educated
6. Ambitious
7. Loves children
8. Wants to have his own family
9. Loves me
10. Cares about his children
11. Loves God
12. Not lazy
13. Has a job or working towards a career.
14. Treats me well

Write characteristics that really matter to you.

It makes no sense to have a good looking guy who has all the swag in the world but can’t provide or has no plans. If God gives you a man who has the important qualities and looks good too? Girl, you are blessed! I am tired of seeing ladies deduce their value for “looks.”

There’s no perfect man but somethings in life is more important than looks.

Is our dating culture setting us up for divorce?

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Think about this question before you read my answer.

picture-of-me-3.pngWhen things don’t go our way in our relationships, we break up. A lot of people enter into relationships to see what they can get not what they can give. How is your dating relationship, preparing you for marriage? Are you learning to forgive each other? Are you learning the importance of communication? Marriage stands against everything this dating culture stands for. Marriage is about love and commitment. How many of us are truly committed to “forever”? Most people on their wedding days quote “till death do us part” but how many of them run out when issues come up. We are so used to breaking up that the idea of divorce doesn’t seem that bad to us. Is our breaking up habit setting us up for divorce later?

Here is a theory from a schoolmate..

“Ok, I have a theory. I am going to call it, Anderson’s 21st Century of Relationship and Marriage Dysfunction. Young adults in the 21st century under the age of forty, have a problem with the word “sacrifice.” In order to have and maintain a strong marriage and relationship sacrifice is a required necessary element! However, because of the power and innovation of technology, young adults have become selfish, self-centered, egotistical, and have developed the Burger King mentality of thinking “they can have it their way.”

Therefore, if they cannot have what they want, when, where, and how they want it, the relationship or marriage is rendered not worth it and a break up is effective immediately! Not to mention those who remain single past forty never been married or in a longstanding relationship because they say they couldn’t find anybody they were interested in; they did not once even question if whether or not there expectations were even slightly “unrealistic,” which…they usually were! To conclude my theory: selfishness and lack of sacrifice are destroying relationships and marriages in young adults in the 21st century! This is just part one of my theory!”- Justin  Anderson

Dear Mr. Someone,

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Chai.. Where do I start? You are by far the most Amazing guy I have ever spoken to. Your heart for God and people makes you the most attractive guy I have come across on this planet. Since high school, I wrote down my kind of man. I’ve never met anyone who came close to that guy, but you proved me wrong. My kind of guy does exist. You don’t know this. After praying with you, I asked myself.. “Does God jinx people?” I couldn’t ask God this question so I asked myself. Periodically, I asked God “Lord, what is going on? How can you expect me not to like this guy? Did you bring him to see how much I love you, Lord?” I found myself praying about you in church. Thoughts of you filled my mind with the same questions. While the preacher was talking, I was questioning God “Why? What is going on?” I wish I had all the answers to all these questions. I can’t question God anymore; I just have to trust him. His will for us is so much greater than us. Help me Lord to trust you!!!

Our Choices.. Our kids!!

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ImageI was talking to a girl who is pregnant and working in a fast food.
I thank God America takes good care of their children.
If I was having this conversation in Nigeria, God knows I would be crying.
How can a young girl raise up a child with a fast food paycheck? It’s impossible!
Completely Impossible!
I asked her about the child’s father, if he will do anything to support her when the baby is here.
She said, she wasn’t sure that she told him to get it together before the baby comes.

Ladies,
Babies don’t mature men; responsible men are responsible before they bring a child into this world.
Don’t expect anything to change if you decide for whatever reason to have a child with a man who is immature.
Ladies the decision you make affect will affect your child for the rest of their lives.
If we knew the power we have over our children’s’ life, we would be more careful with our decisions.
Even though, I have no kids now, I still have to think how my decisions will affect my kids.

If I choose to have kids out of wedlock will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who doesn’t love me will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who doesn’t want kids will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone I married will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who is immature will affect my kids.

I want my kids to have a father and mother who love them living in the same house taking care of them.
I want my kids to have their father in their lives.
I want my kids to have everything they need to make them successful.
I want my girls to grow up to be intelligent, God-fearing, virtuous, strong and great contributors to our society.
I want my boys to grow to be like their father.

It may not happen how I want it to happen but I am not going to set myself for failure by having a child with someone whom I am not married to or not responsible.
To be honest, I don’t want baby-daddy drama. I don’t want to beg any guy to take care of their responsibility.
I want the best for my kids for this reason, I have to choose wisely.

Women your choices will affect your children. Choose wisely!!!

You have to trust her..

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Who is she?
She is your intuition.
Some people call her that “gut feeling.”

When a guy or girl does or tells you and all of a sudden, you know something is not right.
That’s her telling you something is wrong.
We all have her in the inside of us.
She will not lead you astray.
Trust her!!!

She will never tell you something that could bring harm to you or someone else.
Trust your judgment.
We all have the ability to make good decisions.

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Love Thy Neighbor

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This is where I hate politics..
I have nothing against Republicans but it seems they make decisions only for their benefit.
The President has been advocating for an immigration reform but Republicans in Congress were dragging their feet for 4yrs until..
Mitt Romney lost..
Clearly, this sent a wake call to Republicans.
All of a sudden, Republicans now have an epiphany that they really need Hispanics votes.
To my surprise, Republicans even drafted their own bill in less than a month after the fiscal cliff.

To Republicans..
Most of you guys claim to be Christians..
Why do you oppose decisions that will benefit people?.
When did your political agendas become more important than people?
I mean, I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard that your incentive to draft this bill was so you can win Hispanics votes in your next elections.
You quickly act in order to protect your political endeavors..
Why do you Republicans like to sell fish?
Obviously, your political endeavors is more important than helping people?

I get so disappointed with Republicans because most of you are Christians.
What does the good book say?
Love your neighbor as yourself.
I mean, what would Jesus do?
If Mitt Romney won the Presidential elections,
you best believe no Republican in Congress would have drafted any immigration bill..

I have seen this trend among Republicans for several years..
Sometimes, I just wish you’d stop thinking about yourselves for once.

STOP PLAYING POLITICAL GAMES WITH PEOPLE’S LIVES…STOP!

Tough Decisions..

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I had to decide..
I didn’t want to make this decision.
But I knew that at some point, I had to woman up and make it.
It was tough,
My emotions were screaming <what are u doing?>
I ignored my emotions,
I did what needed done,

After, I decided..
I asked myself..
Did you make the right decision?
Of course..I couldn’t answer that question till Now..
It’s still hard but it is getting easier as the days go by.
I look back just a week later..

Finally, I can say..
I made the right decision.
God first.
I can’t compromise!!

How fine is your Man?

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Ladies,

We see a Black man and our heads start spinning.. LOL!!
There’s nothing wrong in thinking a guy is attractive.
However, check yourself that you don’t lust.

We are only suppose to lust after our husbands.
If you don’t have a husband,
you probably shouldn’t be lusting after anybody.

Girl, go beyond looks,
Does he love the Lord?
Not just go to Church,
does he have an intimate relationship with the Lord?

Guys are getting smart these days..
Some guys don’t just go to church,
they go to meet ladies.
We have to be wise,
going to church or singing in the choir is not enough.

You be the judge..
With the leadership of the holy spirit,
you will know if this guy is legit or not..

Please look beyond looks..
Check out his character.
What is his character telling you about him?
Pray about it.

Cos a black_man_praying  that puts God first should be PRAISED!!

 

Decisions..

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I am having a hard time knowing what to share on this blog.
As you know, I have 9jagirl4real and I write more often on it than this one.
I have a heart for people
and a passion for helping people..
As the Lord will lead..
this blog will be up and active in 2013..
I don’t know what I will be sharing on this blog..
I have a lot of ideas.
I pray God takes over.