A lot of women and men have this long list of what they want in their future spouse, but they don’t have the same qualities as the person they want.
If you are looking for these qualities:
1.Love God
2. Muscular
3. Educated
4. Confident
5. Goal-oriented
6. Family-oriented
7. Love kids
8. Dress well
9. Loyal
10. Strong
11. Great relationship with his family
Just to name a few..
Make sure you also:
1. Love God
2. Fit
3. Educated
4. Confident
5. Goal-oriented
6. Family-oriented
7. Love kids
8. Dress well
9.Loyal
10. Strong
11. Great relationship with your family.
The person you want also wants someone with the same qualities. If you want a guy who loves the lord, trust me most likely he wants a woman who loves the lord too. Be the person you want.
YES, I seriously believe good guys don’t club. Good guys look for commitments not flings. I rarely hear guys say, I want to find my wife at the club. Ladies, if you are going to the club to find your husband. NEW FLASH: He is not there. No reasonably guy will go to the club to find a meaningful long lasting relationship. Most guys, who go to clubs, go for one reason (you already know). Ladies, don’t expect any guy you meet at the club to respect you because they also know you came for the same reasons they came. Guys are not stupid, they will go to club and party it up but when it is time for them to settle down. They will go somewhere else and find their wife. Boys are at the clubs. Real men are in responsible places.
Yesterday, I chose to get angry over something someone did. I did not say he or she made me angry, I said I chose to get angry. I said it that way because I had a choice not to get angry but I chose to get angry.
We can’t control what people do to us but we can control how we respond to people. We want to respond emotionally when people do things we don’t like, but anybody who can make you angry has power over you.
Don’t give people the power to control your emotions. Our emotions should be stable regardless of what people do to us. Anyone who can control your emotions can control you.
I saw pleasure on this girl’s face yesterday and I told myself, I can’t let this happen again. Miserable people want to make other people miserable. It is important that we don’t allow people’s actions control our emotions.
If they can control your emotions, they can control you. If you don’t want people to control you don’t let their actions control your emotions.
1. Stay positive-This is so important.. Speak positively about the situation. Think positively about the situation and stay positive. You have to make a conscious effort to do this because it is not easy. Life is all about perspective, so give a positive spin to the situation.
2. Counseling-I remember one of my classmates suggesting this to me. I went for two sessions and that was it. I have nothing against counseling; try it if it works for you use it. Personally, I didn’t stick to it because I made God my counselor. What does that mean? I would literally schedule time to spend time with God to get through this.
3. Speak life to the situation- I changed my vocabulary about the situation. Every time, I remember that I just failed. I would open my mouth and say “I am a success story.” Yes, you just failed. It doesn’t make any sense to use your words to beat yourself up. Use your words to speak life. You can say, “The lord will perfect that which concerns me” but make sure you speak life.
4. Exercise-Do whatever you do to help you with stress. If you like going out with friends to relax, do it. It has to be something you enjoy. For me, exercise helps me a lot with stress. I suggest, it should be something that will help you relieve stress.
5. Read– One of the books, I read which really helped me out was “the traveler’s Gift” by Andy Andrews. This book talks about a guy who is going through failure all around and he goes around meeting prominent people in history who give him some amazing advice about life. You don’t have to read this book but read a self-improvement book.
6. Take responsibility for what happened. Don’t say this teacher didn’t like me. You can’t move forward unto you take responsibility for what happened to you. Complete this sentence: I am here because I didn’t… Complete this sentence honestly without beating yourself up.
7. You have to move forward. Moving forward could mean trying again and again. Whatever moving forward means to you do. For me, it meant trying again which I did but it didn’t work; however, I persevered. You might have to change your major etc but do not put your education on pause. Go forward.
8. This is not the time to talk to negative people. When you are at your lowest this is when your friends need to be your cheerleader. Cut out talking to negative people. If the negative person is your family member decrease the amount of time you talk to them. When you are very vulnerable at this time, you can’t afford to talk to people who will pull you down.
9. Look over your school journey what will you do differently next time? Implement the necessary changes you need now.
10. Never believe you are a failure. Believe that the best is yet to come. People who are afraid to try already accepted failure. You didn’t, you gave it your all and that’s what will put you on the road to success. Successful people are not discouraged by failure, they are encouraged by it.
11. Create a journal and write down your thoughts. If you don’t like writing; at least, do videos on your laptop and store them on your computer. You don’t have to upload them on youtube (except you want do).
12. Write down new goals and go after them.
13. See yourself already where you want to be. This academic difficulty situation caused me to post pone my graduation. It was very important for me to see myself walking across that stage before it happened.
Day dream about where you want to be and see yourself there. I had pictures of people with graduation gowns all over my dorm room. Your mind is the canvas you use to paint your future. Paint wisely! Remember as a man thinks in his heart so is he (Proverbs 23:7)
14. Watch this video:
No matter how many times you get knocked down, you have to get back up. Please, get back up and move forward!
I was talking to a girl who is pregnant and working in a fast food.
I thank God America takes good care of their children.
If I was having this conversation in Nigeria, God knows I would be crying.
How can a young girl raise up a child with a fast food paycheck? It’s impossible!
Completely Impossible!
I asked her about the child’s father, if he will do anything to support her when the baby is here.
She said, she wasn’t sure that she told him to get it together before the baby comes.
Ladies,
Babies don’t mature men; responsible men are responsible before they bring a child into this world.
Don’t expect anything to change if you decide for whatever reason to have a child with a man who is immature.
Ladies the decision you make affect will affect your child for the rest of their lives.
If we knew the power we have over our children’s’ life, we would be more careful with our decisions.
Even though, I have no kids now, I still have to think how my decisions will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids out of wedlock will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who doesn’t love me will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who doesn’t want kids will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone I married will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who is immature will affect my kids.
I want my kids to have a father and mother who love them living in the same house taking care of them.
I want my kids to have their father in their lives.
I want my kids to have everything they need to make them successful.
I want my girls to grow up to be intelligent, God-fearing, virtuous, strong and great contributors to our society.
I want my boys to grow to be like their father.
It may not happen how I want it to happen but I am not going to set myself for failure by having a child with someone whom I am not married to or not responsible.
To be honest, I don’t want baby-daddy drama. I don’t want to beg any guy to take care of their responsibility.
I want the best for my kids for this reason, I have to choose wisely.
Women your choices will affect your children. Choose wisely!!!
7 SINS U MUST NEVER COMMIT AGAINST A WOMAN…
1. Don’t beat her
2. Don’t verbally abuse her
3. Don’t disrespect her
4. Don’t make her feel unloved
5. Don’t Rape her
6. Don’t cheat on her
7. Don’t ignore her Love Languages.
Give her kindness, she’ll give u LOVE
Give her smiles, she’ll give u laughter
Give her your heart, she’ll give u her LIFE
Give her a house, she’ll give u a HOME
Give her an idea, she will give you a plan.
Treat Her Like a Queen, She ll make u a KING.
LOVE her, and she’ll SUBMIT herself!
Sin against her and She will make your life miserable, good measure, pressed down, shaking together and Running over.
“In your mind, never let ‘Logic’ play the role of ‘Sole Adviser’ or you might wind up missing out on so much prospective moments and disregard the certainty of miracles” -Ub Matthews
My words to menblog post inspired me to ask this question.
Anonymously, I asked the coach of Unplugged this question. I know what you are thinking.. Ironically, a female asked this question lol! I love his answer so much, I had to share it.
Here is his answer:
To answer your question directly all 3 defines a man… age lets us know outwardly he’s a man, maturity lets us know he understands and applies what it takes to be a man and his relationship with God validates he’s a man. The issue is many of us men are only found to be men by meeting the age requirement only.
The definition of a man ultimately comes from what God originally defines a man to be… The tragedy happened at the fall where we lost that definition. And from that moment we have been trying to discover “what defines a man” only to find ourselves confused. Some believe that strictly being a male outwardly validates manhood some even take it a step further and say that they are a man based upon their occurred level of maturity or their accomplishments.
These things may to a degree help us understand manhood but until we have a thriving relationship with God we will never know what it takes to be a man and surprisingly we will never and I mean never match the original definition of a man we can only trust in the perfect man to help us in our discoveries and that perfect man is Jesus.
