Author Archives: 9jagirl4real

Divorce is NOT an option!!

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I am at the stage in my life where I am accepting applications for 9jaboy4real, if you are interested email me at [email protected] (only serious applications will be accepted, LOL!!). In a few years, I will be married and have children (by God’s grace). Even though, I am not yet married I am always thinking about what’s best for my children. What’s best for my children guides a lot of my decisions because if I like it or not; the decisions I make now will affect my children positively or negatively. I don’t want my children to suffer for the poor decisions I make in life.

I went to college with a guy who said that his dad lived down the street from his house but he refused to walk a few blocks to come see him. I saw the pain in that boy’s eyes from that day, I decided I’d never make a careless decision that will jeopardize my children’s happiness. I grew up with both my parents so I don’t fully understand what it means to only have one parent and rejection by another parent. I have heard of enough stories of children who felt abandoned by their father and I can’t imagine the emotional pain they go through every day. In life you can’t control what happens to you most of the time but what I can control I will.

Statistics are against children from broken homes. I have seen how broken families mess up children and I don’t want to put my children through that. Divorce affects the children more than it affects the parents. For the sake of my children, divorce can’t be an option.

Don’t get me wrong in the presence of verbal or physical abuse; divorce has to be an option because I need to stay alive to take care of my children. African women will do anything for their children and I am no different.
I don’t want to bring my children into an emotional mess. Each child deals with divorce in their own way. It is not God’s will for my children to be born into a broken home. My children deserve the right to have parents walking side by side to give them a better future.

To 9jaboy4real (whoever you are): Divorce is NOT an option!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We all need Music Therapy..

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Music therapy is the use of music interventions to accomplish individual goals with a credential professional(American Music Therapy Association). Professionals use music interventions because it really works. When life gets rough, I use music therapy. No, I don’t go to a professional. I gather my own motivational songs and I do my own music therapy. We can all benefit from music therapy. We have different reasons why we listen to music. Sometimes in life we need that moment where we shut everybody out and listen to good relaxing music.

How to pick the songs for your Music therapy?

What are you struggling with? It could be pain. You might must to listen to songs about healing. Songs like “I am the Lord that healeth thee” by Don Moen

Are you struggling with disappointment? Songs like “God will make a way” by Don Moen could come in handy.

If you are not a Christian; pick songs that encourage you in order to get through. It is not the time to listen to depressing music or songs that make you feel worse. You definitely need a group of positive songs where you can always listen to feel uplifted.

Here is my go to songs for music therapy: It has the mixture of relaxing and uplifting songs.

1. Jonathan McReynolds – God Is Able

2. Yiruma-River runs through you.
3. Imagine Me-Kirk Franklin
4. Get Up-Mary Mary

5. I worship you by Mary Mary
6. Lifted by Frank Edwards

7. Soweto Gospel Choir ft Joe Praize-Mighty God
8. Heal the World-Michael Jackson
9. I then shall Live by Gaither Vocal Band
10. Never Give Up-Yolanda Adams

Make a playlist for your motivational songs and play them over and over again. When you are going through things, it is important you listen to encouraging and relaxing songs. We all use music in different ways; it’s time we use music for our benefit.

Selah!

You lived a good life.. Maya Angelou RIP

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“One isn’t necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can’t be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.”–Maya Angelou

Your legacy lives on..

The Hottest blog post on 9jagirl4real (Results)..

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I have 439 blog posts on 9jagirl4real.
Out of 439 blog posts on 9jagirl4real, you would be surprised to know that one particular blog gets the most attention.
Which one is it?

Stats from 5/25/13-5/25/14

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Let’s make this easier to read..

Blog Views
Home Page 1,229
Nigerian Men 101 461
Nigerian vs. American Culture 264
Africa 101: African Fashion 259
Ted Talk Review: The Skill of Self Confidence by Dr. Ivan 146
Africa 101: Where do Africans live? 113

Let’s look at the top blog posts:

1 year bar

Why does Nigerian Men 101 have the most views?

1. It could be because it has the picture of Kerry Washington in it. Kerry Washington right now is hot cake because of Scandal.
2. Non-Nigerian women are curious about Nigerian men.
3. There are no resources out there to educate Non-Nigerian women about Nigerian Men.
4. Nigerian Men are hot and they are in demand.
5. It could also be that more Nigerian men are chasing after Non-Nigerian women.

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It could be any of those reasons above. To be honest, I think this blog post gets the most views because women are actually searching for information about Nigerian men. You don’t believe me? Take a look at this..

The chart below shows Google referrals to my blog.
Search engines refer people to my blog base on their search topics or questions.
Look at the chart below and see how many times someone searched about dating Nigerian men..etc.

Nigerian men stats

I do apologize the chart is a little hard to see.
According to the Chart, it shows that Nigerian vs. American culture had the most search referrals.

If you look closely you will see searches such as: “dating a Nigerian man,” “dating Nigerian man” and “Dating Nigerian men.”

Out of 439 blog posts on 9jagirl4real-Nigerian Men 101: For Non-Nigerian women gets the most attention.

GOOD NEWS for a lot Single Nigerian Men: Women or Men are searching for you(I can’t tell if they are mostly females. I hope they are mostly females).

The Hottest Post on 9jagirl4real..

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snapshot(6)As a blogger it is very important for me to know my audience and what they like.
I have been blogging for two years and to be honest; I don’t care about the stats but I do care about my audience.
9jagirl4real was birthed at a very vulnerable time in my life. It allowed me to escape a painful reality at the time.
I have 439 blog posts on 9jagirl4real.
Out of 439 blog posts on 9jagirl4real, you would be surprised to know that one particular blog gets the most attention.
Which one it it?

The result will be announced: TOMORROW.

Hint: It is going to make a group of people very happy!!

10 reasons to marry a Nigerian Man for Non-Nigerian Women:

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1. Most Nigerian men are aggressive meaning he will fight for you and his family at all cost.
2. Nigerian men love soccer-he might even love soccer more than you but he will always make you think that you are first.
3. Nigerian men secretly still love Nigerian women. Don’t let him deceive you.
4. Nigerian men love fufu (especially egusi with lots of goat meat): What? You don’t understand? You will.
5. Nigerian men speak a second language that might be attractive to you. Wait till he is around his friends and family; he will be talking about you with his friends and family in front of you.
6. Men cheat a lot. Nigerian men are not exempted.
7. Nigerian men have this big ego that is difficult to tame.
8. Nigerian men might want to go back to Nigeria.
9. Nigerian men might have more responsibility to take care of his family back at home.
10. Nigerian men are ready anything. Be ready to deal with anything.

Seriously, if you need a reason to marry a Nigerian man don’t marry him. Leave him for us (Nigerian women). Love has no reason. Nigerian men without a shadow of doubt are the best on earth.
To all women married or going to marry Nigerian men: PLEASE TREAT OUR MEN WELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Disclaimer: Not everything on this list is true.