Tag Archives: Culture

For my Nigerian Sisters,

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SINGLE BUT NOT STUPID 379 written by George Essien

Most African women marry for financial security and miss out on that beautiful feeling and joy called love. They live boring lives with a man they sincerely don’t connect with,enduring the marriage through the years.

Very few marry for love.And those who marry for love work out their financial security together and get it eventually,haven’t you noticed?Then they have the two – love and finance. Romance and finance.

My thoughts:

Forget that money thing..
Love is priceless o!
Your love is too expensive for money.

Please my Nigerian sisters,
you deserve to be happy.
I want you to be happy.
I am tired of seeing women maltreated in their marriages
Love, friendship, and commitment makes a difference.
Remember, you have to love him too.
If you don’t love him..don’t marry him because you will take his love for granted.

Love is PRICELESS!!

I like my Man..

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-Masculine (huge muscles and all), Dark-skinned and everything masculine (nothing feminine)..
My man is the kind of man you look at and all you see is a “MAN!!”
I like my Man EXTRA, EXTRA MANLY with no trace of femininity.
Ladies, its very easy to focus on the physical characteristics of what we want in man that we forget the most important thing.
Looks are important too don’t get it twisted but character is more important.
Trust me, I want a man who looks good but most importantly I want a man who..

1. Loves God
2. Loves people
3. Great father

….etc.. etc..

His muscles will go through natural old age atrophy. His good looks will disappear one day. There’s more to love than just looks. Let’s forget about looks for a second. What kind of man do you want?

Please write it down..

Start by writing “I want a man who”

Example:
1. Provides for his family
2. Hardworking
3. Honest
4. Intelligent
5. Educated
6. Ambitious
7. Loves children
8. Wants to have his own family
9. Loves me
10. Cares about his children
11. Loves God
12. Not lazy
13. Has a job or working towards a career.
14. Treats me well

Write characteristics that really matter to you.

It makes no sense to have a good looking guy who has all the swag in the world but can’t provide or has no plans. If God gives you a man who has the important qualities and looks good too? Girl, you are blessed! I am tired of seeing ladies deduce their value for “looks.”

There’s no perfect man but somethings in life is more important than looks.

Is our dating culture setting us up for divorce?

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Think about this question before you read my answer.

picture-of-me-3.pngWhen things don’t go our way in our relationships, we break up. A lot of people enter into relationships to see what they can get not what they can give. How is your dating relationship, preparing you for marriage? Are you learning to forgive each other? Are you learning the importance of communication? Marriage stands against everything this dating culture stands for. Marriage is about love and commitment. How many of us are truly committed to “forever”? Most people on their wedding days quote “till death do us part” but how many of them run out when issues come up. We are so used to breaking up that the idea of divorce doesn’t seem that bad to us. Is our breaking up habit setting us up for divorce later?

Here is a theory from a schoolmate..

“Ok, I have a theory. I am going to call it, Anderson’s 21st Century of Relationship and Marriage Dysfunction. Young adults in the 21st century under the age of forty, have a problem with the word “sacrifice.” In order to have and maintain a strong marriage and relationship sacrifice is a required necessary element! However, because of the power and innovation of technology, young adults have become selfish, self-centered, egotistical, and have developed the Burger King mentality of thinking “they can have it their way.”

Therefore, if they cannot have what they want, when, where, and how they want it, the relationship or marriage is rendered not worth it and a break up is effective immediately! Not to mention those who remain single past forty never been married or in a longstanding relationship because they say they couldn’t find anybody they were interested in; they did not once even question if whether or not there expectations were even slightly “unrealistic,” which…they usually were! To conclude my theory: selfishness and lack of sacrifice are destroying relationships and marriages in young adults in the 21st century! This is just part one of my theory!”- Justin  Anderson

Why Africans look down on Black Americans?

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After doing my research, I found four points were present in all the sources I reviewed. It became too redundant that it bored me.

4 Points I found in all my Sources:

1. Africans really think that Black-Americans are violent and lazy- One the sources clearly said that Africans are picking up the white’s fear of blacks (I thought this was very interesting).
2. Africans hate the fact that African-Americans blame slavery and racism for most of their problems.
3. Africans don’t understand why African-Americans don’t take advantage of the many opportunities available to them here in the States.
4. Africans think that a lot of Black-Americans are ignorant about Africa because they still have this primitive, old perception of Africans.

Of course this is not TRUE for all Africans. The four points above could be one of the reasons why Africans look down on Black Americans. All four points were found in all the sources I reviewed. Interesting points, I also found..

1. Africans know their identities are not easily offended when people try to put them down (found in the first source).
2. Africans and Black-American respond to adversity differently. Black-Americans blame the system while Africans are willing to do any jobs instead of blaming the system (found in the first source).
3. Africans receive better treatments from whites which angers Black-Americans (found in the second source).
4. Africans see education as a tool that open the doors within the American society(found in the second source).

The only thing that could undermine this research is that I did not review more sources. Honestly after two educational sources and a research based article with the same results… The light bulb came on.

Sources: Click below

Source 1
Source 2
Source 3

What do you guys think?

Urgent News for Nigerian Ladies: LifeSizeDoll.com.ng is calling your Name..

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Carleyrae Highneck Dollprint Dress Vintage Check Print Pleat Skirt With Mesh Underlay Acid Wash LeggingsMidi Tassle Fringe Skirt  Disco Fringe Mini Bootleg Pinafore Overalls

You can order these beautiful and more from LifeSizeDoll.com.ng your Online Nigerian clothing store. You deserve the best! Click on the website and see for yourself.

Things Nigerian guys need to consider before going home to pick a wife..

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This one is for Nigerian guys who want to go back home to find a wife. First of all, I want to congratulate you on this big step. Finding a wife is not easy at all o!  This post is really for Nigerian guys who call their parents or people they trust back at home to find them one innocent virgin girl for them to come home to marry. C’mon… Guys!! Come on!! I know the idea of finding one innocent girl to marry is intriguing, but wait one minute…  How long do you know her? This post is coming from a special place because I hate seeing people hurt.

You called someone you trust to find you a lady who can cook you egusi and give you lots of babies doesn’t mean anything. They found you a lady who you can be a great wife and mother doesn’t mean she is the person they say she is. You are the person who will be spending the rest of your life with her (hopefully). Invest time and get to know who you are marrying. I know the people who gave you this recommendation have the best intentions for you doesn’t mean that this girl is on the same page as them.

Their recommendation is not enough… Get to know the lady you are marrying. It surprises how some guys will get a recommendation about a lady and marry her quickly. Marriage is not a joke. Going home to marry someone and bringing them overseas is a big commitment and sacrifice. You need to be sure of your decision. Don’t rush into the marriage. Get to know the person you are marrying for your own peace of mind.

When you marry people in general without investing the time to know the person for yourself, you are marrying at your own risk. The immigration battle is not worth it if you are not going to have a peace of mind in your marriage. I have heard of circumstances where a man has gone home to marry and the woman came over here to rip where she didn’t sow.  People you know all your life can still tear you down, but don’t take that risk by not knowing the person you are marrying.

Risk is great but marriage is not the place for it. Before you go home to marry please get to know the person you are marrying for yourself. The people giving you these recommendations are not marrying her, you are. Be careful and choose wisely!!

modiva:</p><br /><br /> <p>Nigerian guys</p><br /><br /> <p>* Nigerian Power Rangers

Clean Nigerian Music Videos 2014 Part 1

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As a Christian it’s very important I don’t listen to everything. I love music so much especially Nigerian music. Recently, I noticed I can’t speak my native language fluently like I did ten years ago. Not speaking my native language fluently did things to me emotionally. Nigerian music helps in so many ways I can’t explain. I love being here in the States (especially with the fiasco with Boko Haram).  Nigerian music takes me back home, which makes it very special to me.

The problem with our music now is that it is getting more westernized. So we now see more Nigerian music videos with half naked girls, girls dancing as prostitutes and all sorts of nonsense. I love God so music with naked girls shaking their butts wouldn’t work for me. This list of Nigerian music videos is for Nigerians, Africans or anyone who appreciates Nigerian music without “the extras.”

1. Mama Africa by Bracket

2. Aye by Davido

3. Black is beautiful-Flavour

4. oh Baby by Chindinma ft Flavour

God is a Brand not just any Brand:The best spoken word I have ever heard..

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You have to hear this.. Click the video below and watch!!!

What did you think? Amazing right?

How to know a Nigerian man loves you?

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1. You will know-Ladies, we have something special called “female intuition” and it wouldn’t lead you astray. If your judgment is not clouded by past hurts, trust issues, and premarital sex, you should be able to trust your female intuition. Most of the time when we ask people for relationship advice, we subconsciously want them to tell us something different from the truth we already know. You already know if he loves you or not.

2. If you are sexually active with him; tell him you want to abstain from sex for a little while and see how he responds to that. If he loves you, he will abstain genuinely without cheating on you with somebody else. If he doesn’t love you, he will definitely cheat on you. Personally, I think it is better to stay away from sex during your premarital relationship because sex will cloud your judgment.

3. If you are sexually active, bring up the topic about having kids and see his reaction. If he doesn’t love you, the idea of having kids with you will not seat well with him. Ask and see his reaction. If he sees a future with you, he most likely loves you.

4. Nigerian men value their families. If he you are the first girl to meet his family, he really loves you. If the Nigerian guy has the habit of bringing girls home then ignore this point. Nigerian families are evolving before if a guy brought someone to meet his family his intentions were clear.

5. Friends-if he brings you around his friends, it’s a good sign. When you meet his friends, you want to pay attention to how they treat you. If he is a player-type, they might treat you like one of his many girls. Be observant and make your own judgment.

7. Love yourself and you will know when you are loved.

Tips:
1. Nigerian men are very intelligent. Be smart on how you deal with Nigerian men.
2. A Nigerian man will sleep with you and go back home(Nigeria) to marry a virgin.

Please Like us on Facebook..9jagirl4real!!!!

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You can buy this beautiful African necklace wore in the video here.

Divorce is NOT an option!!

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I am at the stage in my life where I am accepting applications for 9jaboy4real, if you are interested email me at [email protected] (only serious applications will be accepted, LOL!!). In a few years, I will be married and have children (by God’s grace). Even though, I am not yet married I am always thinking about what’s best for my children. What’s best for my children guides a lot of my decisions because if I like it or not; the decisions I make now will affect my children positively or negatively. I don’t want my children to suffer for the poor decisions I make in life.

I went to college with a guy who said that his dad lived down the street from his house but he refused to walk a few blocks to come see him. I saw the pain in that boy’s eyes from that day, I decided I’d never make a careless decision that will jeopardize my children’s happiness. I grew up with both my parents so I don’t fully understand what it means to only have one parent and rejection by another parent. I have heard of enough stories of children who felt abandoned by their father and I can’t imagine the emotional pain they go through every day. In life you can’t control what happens to you most of the time but what I can control I will.

Statistics are against children from broken homes. I have seen how broken families mess up children and I don’t want to put my children through that. Divorce affects the children more than it affects the parents. For the sake of my children, divorce can’t be an option.

Don’t get me wrong in the presence of verbal or physical abuse; divorce has to be an option because I need to stay alive to take care of my children. African women will do anything for their children and I am no different.
I don’t want to bring my children into an emotional mess. Each child deals with divorce in their own way. It is not God’s will for my children to be born into a broken home. My children deserve the right to have parents walking side by side to give them a better future.

To 9jaboy4real (whoever you are): Divorce is NOT an option!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!