Military question: Are you a Virgin?

Military womanApparently in Indonesia, women have to pass a virginity test to join the military. According to this article, it is done because they want women who are physically and mentally stable. Some articles say these women have to be virgins for national security reasons. So countries who have non-virgins women in their military are posing a threat to their national security? Wow..

What about your men? Are your men virgins? Your women can be virgins all day, but what about your men? What are the men doing? Don’t they need the same mental stability? In fact, virgin military women are a threat to your national security. Let’s be real, most men desire virgins thus, a military full of virgins is a national security problem. Do you really think your military men can concentrate with a military full of virgin women? Come on now..

It takes a man to deflower a virgin.. Drops mic..

Click to read the full article.

The Bride Price Market: What is Your Price?

Nigerian women, there’s an invisible bride price market in our society.
8 out 10 Nigerian guys believe with the right price, they can get any girl in Nigeria.
If a man can buy you, you are an expensive Ferrari with baby-making capability, house-making capability, cooking capability, love-making capability and much more.

3 out of the 4 Nigerian guys I meet want to make money before they choose their wives.
One guy clearly told me that a lot of Nigerian girls will flock around when there is money, so he will choose who he really wants when he has money.

A lot of Nigerian women are belittling their value for common naira or dollars.
We have devalued our worth to mere $$$$.

YOU ARE PRICELESS..
You are too expensive for money to buy.
Don’t devalue your worth for anyone or anything. It is not worth it.

Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband has trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Photo Credits: Photogenik Photo

True love is beautiful

Good looking People are OVERRATED!!!

Good looks are OVerratedDefinition of good looking (for women: big breasts, big butts and a pretty face. For men: tall, muscular, six packs and a handsome face) for the purpose of this post. From my observation, people with these features in the American society are venerated.

Good-looking people have it pretty easy in a society that value first impressions. People automatically attribute positive emotions to people with pretty faces and features. It is very easy for a good-looking person to depend on their looks for better opportunities and privileges in this society. Most of the time, people who are genetically blessed with a pretty face live a less ignominious life.

As a good girl you will enjoy these perks:
1. Having more ‘friends’ since most people want to associate themselves with someone good-looking.
2. Having rich friends-even if your parents are poor, don’t worry your pretty face gets a pass into the rich club.
3.Being showed love and ask out on a date by guys oftener .
4. Having boys fight over you.
5. Always been part of the popular group because you have “the hottie” pass.
6. You get an extra tip as a waitress, customer service rep or a sales person.
7. And many more.

As a boy you will enjoy these perks:
1. Getting her to stare
2. Being the popular (football) player everyone wants to hang around.
3. Getting the girl you want (95% of the time)
4. Having a lot of friends.
5. Getting the job you want
To name a few..

Having a pretty face with attractive features helps in this society, we can all agree. We capitalize on looks too much in this society to the point that children begin having low self- esteem issues in elementary schools and below average looking people commit suicide because they feel they are ugly.

Let’s be real, good-looking people with pretty faces and attractive features are genetically blessed. They are blessed with attractive features genetically passed down, none of which they earned. They did nothing to earn their fine looks. Thus, it is an oblivious action to bless people with favors they don’t deserve. Gifts in the name of being “good-looking” are absolutely unnecessary. None of these “good-looking” people worked for their pretty face and attractive features yet; they get a pass in this society. The one that annoys me the most is when we give passes to “good-looking” people with bad behaviors. Somehow their good-looks is an excuse for their bad behavior or character. By the way, not all “good-looking” people have bad behaviors.

NEWS FLASH: PHYSICAL BEAUTY FADES, CHARACTER IS FOREVER.

People who are not attractive to you shouldn’t be treated poorly because they are attractive to someone else. There’s no uniform scale of attractiveness; yes the people with pretty faces and attractive features will get the most attention, it doesn’t mean that those without these features are unattractive. We are all attractive!!! Stop putting down people who are not attractive to you.

Indeed, we are sexual beings; we naturally favor people who are attractive to us.There’s nothing wrong in admiring God’s creation; however, we are wrong for placing more emphasis on people’s  attractiveness than their character. It’s doesn’t matter how fine you are on the outside, if your character stinks; you are ugly in my eyes.

In my opinion..
Good Looks+ bad Character=Ugly
Good Looks + good Character=GORGEOUS
Bad looks+ good character=Gorgeous
Bad Looks + bad character=UGLY

Looks will fade, Character is FOREVER.

Photo Credit: Google Images

For Non-Nigerian Women: How to make a Nigerian man LOVE you..

Nigerian guy1. If you googled (how to make a Nigerian Man love you), you are trying too hard. Men in general subconsciously have desperate detectors. I have never met a man who likes desperate; he probably exists, I haven’t met him yet. No matter how desperate you are, he does not have to know.

Why should you hide desperate? This is very important because some Nigerian guys can capitalize on it and use it to their advantage. Trust me, hiding the thirst will work for you. If he likes you, he will chase you. Allow him to chase you.

Nigerian guys are in your home country for a chance for a better job opportunity, education, etc. They already understand that something worth having is worth chasing. If he likes you, he will come after you except he is married or a wimp. If he married or a wimp, you don’t want him anyways, let him go. Stop trying so hard to win his attention. If he doesn’t like you, you will meet somebody else who adores you.

2. Love yourself: you know that quote “nobody can love you until you love yourself”(unknown).. Very true!! No guy in this world can love you until you love yourself.

3. Have something going for yourself: education is huge in our Nigerian culture. If you are not educated, at least have something going for yourself.

4. Be yourself: This may sound like a cliché but it is absolutely true. Be the best you and you will attract the right man.

Honestly ladies, there’s no right formula to get a Nigerian man (or any guy). My suggestion is to stop trying and be yourself. Guys are ok with a smile to let them know you are interested. Know your worth ladies and lets these guys chase after you. You are worth the chase!!!

Take a break from the norm: do something different this Valentine’s Day…

Businesses capitalize on special days to the point that it loses its luster.

"love should spur you with the feeling ike you can conquer the world"

“Your Valentine’s day should be celebrated in a way that reflects your relationship.”-9jagirl4real

Valentine’s day is not about gifts: flowers, jewelry..etc.. Valentine’s day is a day to celebrate your relationship. There’s no universal way of celebrating Valentine’s day. Your relationship is different from other people’s relationship so your Valentine’s day should be celebrated in a way that reflects your relationship.

Here are some 10 new ways you can spice up your Valentine’s day:

1. Love is priceless-Give each other a gift that money can’t buy

2.Be spontaneous by doing something different from your Valentine’s day tradition- if you always go out to eat, go out to a beautiful park in another city and have a picnic. Do something out the norm that will still bring meaning and satisfaction to your relationship.

3. Celebrate Valentine’s day every day 14th day of every month for the whole year or pick another date for your own valentine’s day.

4. Write each other secret love notes and let your partner find them in some unconventional places.

5. For married couples(because I don’t endorse premarital sex): have a quickie in a new spot.

6. If you can afford it: celebrate Valentine’s day in different country(Hint: An African Country).

7. Start a new relationship tradition.

8. Send your children an annoying Valentine’s day selfie.

9. Do something wild, crazy and still legal

10. Prank your kids for your amusement.

Nigerian Men are buying Nigerian Women like Suya..

Woman Holding BanknotesNigerian Women, our sole purpose on earth is not to get married to a politician or a rich man. It is also not our duty to give any man a male child that’s God’s duty. A lot of us have the mentality of marrying rich because the present economic situation in Nigeria. A man who buys your heart with his money will use the same money to manipulate and control you in marriage except he loves you. Even when he loves you, he can still use his money to manipulate you. It is our duty to claim our rights in our society by fighting for it. I hope you are paying attention to what is happening in our society. A lot of rich Nigerian men can get away with anything when it comes to women by using their money. Nigerian women, they are using their money to manipulate you.

How can a politician have a mistress that his wife knows about? Why can’t his wife put her foot down against it? Why are we allowing our men to mistreat us and misuse us? I am aware that not all Nigerian men are this way. A woman should not go crying to her in-laws before her husband understand that he is hurting his wife. Most of these men who do these things do them because they know they can get away with it. Do men really value us as women or do they see us as the properties they can buy? (Please, answer this question). Nigerian women, we are responsible for our place in our society. If you don’t want a place in society continue allowing men to buy you like suya.

Enough is enough!! Nigerian Ladies, the way to solve your economic problem is not to marry a rich husband who can use his money to manipulate you. The way to solve this economic problem is not to sleep with men for job offers or salary. The only solution to this problem is for us to think independently outside the men in our lives. Stop thinking you need a man to maintain you. You can start your business (honestly, genuinely without sleeping with any man for funds). It is time for independent Nigerian women to emerge.

We can be financially stable without depending on any man. I don’t think it’s wrong to depend on your husband to provide for the family, but we need to stand up as Nigerian women and stop allowing these men to use their money to manipulate us.

Money doesn’t equal happiness.

Nigerian Men: Showcase your Style on 9jagirl4real

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Hey Nigerian Guys showcase your creative Nigerian style and fashion art on 9jagirl4real by sending in your picture to my blog’s email.

I will really love to showcase more pictures in African attires. Please send your pictures.
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For my Nigerian Sisters,

SINGLE BUT NOT STUPID 379 written by George Essien

Most African women marry for financial security and miss out on that beautiful feeling and joy called love. They live boring lives with a man they sincerely don’t connect with,enduring the marriage through the years.

Very few marry for love.And those who marry for love work out their financial security together and get it eventually,haven’t you noticed?Then they have the two – love and finance. Romance and finance.

My thoughts:

Forget that money thing..
Love is priceless o!
Your love is too expensive for money.

Please my Nigerian sisters,
you deserve to be happy.
I want you to be happy.
I am tired of seeing women maltreated in their marriages
Love, friendship, and commitment makes a difference.
Remember, you have to love him too.
If you don’t love him..don’t marry him because you will take his love for granted.

Love is PRICELESS!!